Today a truck driving in front of me kicked up an empty bag of Garden Salsa Sun Chips (my favorite Sun Chip so I noticed right away) and it blew past me as if no one cared where it would eventually land... Unless its in some guys yard at which point he'll probably dispose of it in a fairly ignominious fashion. So that got me thinking... What is it with the chicks and the shaving off their eyebrows and drawing in “new” ones? This whole process has perplexed me for ages. OK, so let me say straight out that if you or someone you love suffers from some unfortunate condition like alapicia or some affliction that causes your hair to fall out this rant may come off a bit insensitive and/or sound like I am poking fun. These people are not my target market and I apologize if I offend... That being said, WHAT'S WITH THE CHICKS AND THE EYEBROWS!!??? Outside of a tweezing incident gone horribly wrong I cannot imagine a scenario that shaving off ones eyebrows would seem like a GOOD idea! I can't wrap my head around it. I can't fathom how difficult it must be to draws those things on every morning. Think about it, they have to MATCH! If not you look like you're questioning everything everybody says, with that raised eyebrow “are you sure about that” look. What if they're not even? Grab the erasure and start over. Too high and you look surprised... constantly.. all day. Too low and you're angry despite perhaps a smile or some other indicator that would dispel such a conclusion. You would be a walking paradox. I never think about my eyebrows, and yet when I'm in the same room as someone who draws their own I cannot stop thinking about theirs. There is NOTHING natural looking about taking a sharpie and drawing a line above someones eye in a vain attempt to replace something that need not be replaced. Yet this seems to be the desired effect many women are going for. Sometimes I just stare at them and think there was a point for them before leaving the house that they said, “yup, I'm good” or “that's what I'm looking for” or at least “I'm ready to go.” I could not disagree more. You are scary looking. I look on in abject horror that this look is what you are somehow wanting. Why is it this way? Why is it that people will go to such extremes to feel like they look good. I barely trust my own judgment to pick out a pair of jeans by myself, much less deciding if my hair looks alright, and I don't have that much of it to begin with. Why do people do this to themselves? We put so much emphasis on the package, and so little on what's inside. Who cares if I'm an idiot as long as I'm pretty. And it must be said that some people pull it off. Being evil and/or stupid yet good looking that is. But others do not. Do not in a bad way. So that's why I love Sun Chips. Sun Chips make me happy. Why? I will tell you, because not only did someone concern themselves with the taste of these dudes, but also that they are somewhat good for you. That may take a little bit more time and effort, but the fine folks at the Sun Chips plant feel its worth it and so do I. We need to make it less about the package and more about what's in it. Otherwise people will just throw you out their window and you'll blow around wasted in the wind like the empty bag you probably are. Sun Chips and eyebrows baby, that's what I'm all about... Let's keep them both REAL!
--finn
